By Allan Shedlin
Grampsy and Founder, Daddying Film Festival & Forum (D3F)
During this “season of good cheer,” I’m fighting mightily to keep empathy overload at bay.
As a guy who tattoos his heart on his arm, because wearing it on my sleeve just doesn’t fully convey my compassionate nature, I’m concerned that good cheer will be harder to come by as I gather with grandkids, kids, chosen family, and friends during this holiday season. And good cheer is more needed than ever before during this time when humanity seems on an endlessly downward spiral with a pace that's picking up exponentially.
The growing tentacles of social media and the 24-hour news cycle seem almost inescapable. Famine, war, and natural catastrophes seep into our consciousness unrestrained. This is a time when “it doesn’t happen here” no longer applies. The cumulative awareness of the catastrophes that we bring on and that surround us cause me to wonder if humanity and inhumanity are trading places so often that what used to be described as “inhumanity” is increasingly defining our species.
As an empath, I feel increasingly powerless to relieve the suffering I would like to relieve with each new and ongoing disaster I learn about. I worry about a sclerosis of feeling, a hardening of my heart, that I may become immune to the suffering and accept it as a “given.” And in so many conversations I’ve had with others, it’s clear I’m not alone with feeling a sense of empathy overload.
Here are some things that I and others have shared with me that may help keep our empathy overload at bay and keep our hearts open and exuberant during this holiday season and beyond:
Laugh and cry a lot
Seize opportunities to show kindness
Surround myself with big-hearted, compassionate, and optimistic people
Walk in nature
Engage less with social and news media
Listen to music and/or burst into song
Volunteer
Pray
Read a good book alone or with your child (maybe one that some have tried to ban!)
Play with pets
Watch a great movie
Practice mindfulness...
What other ideas can you add?
Whatever activities you choose this holiday season, may you be of good cheer, keep your heart open, and Daddy on!
2025 Call for Entries IS OPEN
Students (1st grade - undergrad), Dads/Dad figures, and indie filmmakers, tell us your stories about the importance of having or being an involved dad.
Submit via FilmFreeway now through March 3rd!
Allan Shedlin has devoted his life's work to improving odds for children and families. He has three daughters, five grandchildren, as well as numerous "bonus" children and grandchildren. A trained educator, Allan has alternated between classroom service, school leadership, parenting coaching, policy development, and advising at the local, state, and national levels. After eight years as an elementary school principal, Allan founded and headed the National Elementary School Center for 10 years. He's written about education and parenting for major news outlets and education trade publications, and given numerous TV, radio, and podcast interviews. In 2008, he was the first male honored as a "Living Treasure" by Mothering Magazine and he founded REEL Fathers. In 2017, he founded the DADvocacy Consulting Group. A year later, he launched the DADDY Wishes Fund and Daddy Appleseed Fund. In 2019, he co-created and began co-facilitating the Armor Down/Daddy Up! and Mommy Up! programs. He's conducted daddying workshops in diverse settings of Native American pueblos, veterans groups, nursery schools, penitentiaries, Head Start centers, corporate boardrooms, and elementary schools, signifying the widespread interest men have in becoming the best possible dad. In 2022, Allan founded the Daddying Film Festival & Forum (D3F) to enable students, dads, and other indie filmmakers to use film as a vehicle to communicate the importance of positive dad involvement. Allan earned his elementary and high school diplomas from NYC’s Ethical Culture Schools, BA at Colgate University, MA at Columbia University’s Teachers College, and ABD at Fordham University. But he considers his D-A-D and GRAND D-A-D the most important “degrees” of all.
Комментарии