By Scott Beller
Daddying Editor
"The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."
– Lao Tzu
When we dropped off our not-quite-two-year-old on her first day of preschool, her teachers recommended that we not linger. Simply hand her over, turn around, and go.
Don't look back.
They said it was the best way to break the attachment and ensure the rest of day would go smoothly. Having her newborn sister at home made it a bit easier to divert our attention and quell our anxiety until pickup time, but letting go of our little scholar that day was one of the harder things her mother and I have had to do as parents.
Three years later, on her first day of kindergarten, the anxiety, though not quite as intense, returned. Walk her to the bus stop, take pictures with her friends, watch her bound up those bus stairs, and go. Don't look back.
This weekend, with our now rising high-school senior, we embark on a 12-day road trip covering 1,671 miles through the Northeast to visit prospective college destinations. As we prepare for this next step, my anxious parental mind immediately jumps ahead with the thought: this is a small, first step on our way towards an empty nest.
Don't look back?
When we drop my daughter off at whichever school she chooses to attend in the fall of 2025, looking back is all I'll be doing. It's something we parents of teens seem to do an awful lot. If you've read any of my previous posts here on the Daddying blog, you know it's something I've found irresistible the older and more independent my girls have grown.
For now, I'll distract myself by looking forward to the next two weeks on the road with my oldest daughter. Together with me, her mom, and younger sister, she'll explore new possibilities and envision a bright academic future. Six college campuses in seven days, then finishing up with five relaxing days in Cape Cod and Newport, RI. In my next post, I'll let you know how the 1,000-mile road trip turned out.
That, of course, will require a quick look back. Even so, I bet it will be easier than taking the next step toward letting my oldest child go. It helps a little to know her sister will be home with us for another couple years.
Daddy on.
Scott Beller is the proud, imperfect crew dad of two mighty girl rowers, imperfect husband of a rock-star mom/regatta chaperone, truth teller, former soccer coach, part-time driving instructor, photobomber, purveyor of banned books, Editor of the Daddying blog, and Director of Communications for DCG and D3F. He's a seasoned writer and PR agency veteran with more than 30 years of experience helping organizations of all sizes reach audiences and tell their stories. Prior to launching his own creative communications consultancy in 2003, he led PR teams with some of the world’s most respected agencies, including Fleishman-Hillard and The Weber Group. As a consultant, he’s helped launch two other parenting advocacy nonprofits with DCG founder Allan Shedlin. His first book, Beggars or Angels, was a ghostwritten memoir for the nonprofit Devotion to Children's founder Rosemary Tran Lauer. He was formerly known as "Imperfect Dad" and Head Writer for the Raising Nerd blog, which supported parents in inspiring the next generation of scientists, engineers, and creative problem solvers. He earned his BA in Communications from VA Tech.
Comments